logline: The Afghan Fixer

Lars Nilsson · Kitten Joined: 26 Oct 2009 Posts: 2 Location: Sweden

Hi everyone.

I am a long time lurker and this is my first post. I very much enjoy reading discussions about your loglines and beat sheets! Thank you!

So here is my logline:
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When a pompous Pulitzer nominee gets an unexpected visit from the lovable Afghan fixer who actually did her scoop interviews in Kabul, she struggles to save her family and journalistic credibility.
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I'm thinking ROP/romantic comedy. The reporter and the fixer were lovers in Afghanistan. The fixer went to the mountains and did the award winning Taliban interviews himself (to protect her), got paid, and the reporter took all the credit back home. Now the fixer appears in a different context, he's a refugee and needs her help. He loves her. She loved him as well, but him showing up like this means trouble. She is caught in a web of lies – cheating on her husband and stealing credit for the scoop. Coming up is the award ceremony for the journalistic price..

I'm Swedish so the story will be located in Sweden. The Pulitzer will be the Swedish equivalent, called the Stora Journalistpriset.

Inspiration comes from the great doc "Fixer – The Taking of Ajmal Naqshbandi" and Åsne Seierstad's novel "The Bookseller of Kabul".

My main concern right now is how to construct the Afghan fixer. I don't want to make him a Borat character, but he needs to be funny.
I think he is the antagonist, though he loves her. Could that work?

What do you think?

martinm · Posted: Tue Oct 27, 2009 11:27 am Post subject:

Hi Lars and welcome!

First thoughts - Who is the real "refugee?" By story's end, perhaps we realize it's really the woman, not the Fixer. Not a refugee from a country, but from...something higher, universal and primal - perhaps...love? Something else?

Other stuff:

1. The woman seems unsympathetic, even though you have the love angle and the history involves Fixer having acted to protect her. She loved Fixer and yet took all the credit. Are we rooting for her? If so, why?

2. You mention ROP comedy - right now, I'm seeing it more as a dramatic situation - but maybe it's just the way I'm perceiving it.

3. What is the audience waiting to see? Perhaps wanting to see her "get what's coming to her," to pay the price (usually in terms of a hard lesson) for her deception? Or - perhaps we the audience are waiting for the moment when she realizes she must change, grow, and we can experience the tension/release as she struggles with this, leading finally to a resolution? At any rate, does she, early on, Save the Cat?

2. Yes, Fixer is a perfectly good antagonist - Even though he's not a true "villain," he stands in the way of her "Plan" - which is...what? To continue to enjoy her stardom, reaching ever greater heights? Something like that? To continue enjoying the perks that come along the way? The fact that he loves her does not make him NOT an antagonist. Instead, it actually helps, here.

3. Concerning what she stands to lose - I gather that she'll be exposed as a liar, risks losing her family, her career, perhaps have to endure public shame and humiliation. Fixer stands for all that. That's bad enough, but it's always a good idea to make it ten times worse than the worse, as long as you don't strain credibility. Surprise the audience with just how worse it can get. Make them fear the worse, and then double it.

4. Maybe the absolute worse grows out of something that Fixer knows, or stands for, that will make her peril truly horrifying? For example, "If she were to change (and she doesn't want to change) she stands to lose her career, her family, she'll be exposed as a liar, and perhaps - as we come to realize (usually by midpoint or soon after), worse yet ________."

Perhaps -

5. She'll have to confront horrible inner demons, which she doesn't want to do, and do something about it, which she REALLY doesn't want to do. Perhaps she'll see that she has to become the sort of person who actually helps people, who treats people with respect and kindness, sees their humanity, not as means for her own ends. And how to let go of all those...perks...gained through selfishness? :-) OR Since you've set up Fixer as lovable and funny...maybe, in turn, since she'll be seeing herself in high contrast to Fixer, maybe she realizes that she's not lovable, at all, not at heart, and never was. Thus, it's not just that she must atone for the harm she's done to Fixer, but also for the harm she's done to "the world," in general. Perhaps she has to admit that deception and power is the foundation of her life, when for all appearances, she'd thought of herself as exactly the opposite, and constructed a life, a family, a career around that deception. :-)

Just some ideas.

At any rate, back to your original question, everyone builds a "fortress" to resist having to change. What is her fortress? Fixer is the guy who comes in with "an axe." Even if the "axe" looks like a "butterfly." :-)
That's why he's an Antagonist.

Just a few thoughts. Use whatever works, if anything, and disregard the rest. :-) Welcome to the forum.

Martin

_________________
"Clay. Bill Clay."

Lars Nilsson · Kitten Joined: 26 Oct 2009 Posts: 2 Location: Sweden

Hi Martin

Thanks for very interesting ideas! I will try to comment on your points.

1. Yes I thought the woman should be unsympathetic in the beginning so that she has room to change. Maybe she'll need also something lighter so the audience can attach to her? My initial idea was that she loved him and gave hime all kinds of promises when she was in Afghanistan, but kind of forgot about him when she came home. Like a holiday flirt. When she sees him again she has mixed feelings and ashamed about her lies.

2. I think the story can go either way. A comedy needs dramatic situations as much as any other genre I guess. For love story I need a force to keep the lovers apart and I think her lies and fear of humiliation can be that force. Also her family situation of course.

3. Will she confess about the scoop? Will she break up with her husband and go with the Fixer? Or will she cover up, continue with her career and life, and get the Pulitzer? My idea is that she will grow and finally do the right thing. Confess, apologize, either stay with her family or go with the Fixer (what do you think?). But first she does all she can to "keep her worlds apart".

2-3. Yes I think her Plan is to "continue to enjoy her stardom, reaching ever greater heights?". The Pulitzer price would be a symbol for that.
I thought it might be interesting to have him as an antagonist allthough he loves her and is a nice guy. It's the fact that he's in the "wrong place" that makes him a threat. He implies a blackmail situation. The question is how to make the most drama out of him.

...it's always a good idea to make it ten times worse than the worse, as long as you don't strain credibility. Surprise the audience with just how worse it can get. Make them fear the worse, and then double it.

You're right. I should try to find ways to make things even worse for her! Maybe force her to more lies.

"If she were to change (and she doesn't want to change) she stands to lose her career, her family, she'll be exposed as a liar, and perhaps - as we come to realize (usually by midpoint or soon after), worse yet ________."

Yes this is what I need to come up with. To spice it up.

5. Again very good points! I will think about all this and post again.

Thank you Martin, very helpful! I love this forum!
What do you guys think about the logline itself? Is it tight enough? Exciting enough?

/Lars

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